Posted by Dustin on 3/15/2011 to
Living Sober
"Those who do not recover are people who cannot or will not completely give themselves to this simple program, usually men and women who are constitutionally incapable of being honest with themselves." Alcoholics Anonymous Chapter Five
We deal alot with reservations around here, the idea of closing doors and leaving nothing open for alcohol to sneak back into our lives. It is paramount in recovery that we make certain that one is finished for good an for all. This post is going to, in a round about way, bring into focus the idea that there should be no reservations while pointing out the one true reservation that stands in the way of a person achieving recovery.
For arguments sake here is a Contextual Definition of a reservation:
"There is no way I could stay sober through the loss of my husband."
This statement, though powerful and intense, has ultimately left the door open for alcohol to find it's way into the member's life in the tragic event of the loss of her husband. This is a reservation.
With that said, the Bog Book of Alcoholics Anonymous is very clear about reservations...mentioned in chapter 3, they have used the word must in telling us that we absolutely need to be rid of reservations or any lurking notions.
" If we are planning to stop drinking, there must be no reservation of any kind, nor any lurking notion that someday we will be immune to alcohol." Alcoholics Anonymous Chapter Three
Now, practical application of this reservation removal is another issue all together. While being necessary to maintain permanent sobriety, it may take years and sometimes decades for all of the doors to be sealed shut and for alcohol to remain outside. We begin in early sobriety with things as simple as going to work, taking a paycheck, going to bed at night, all without the use and abuse of alcohol. As we progress further into our sober lives and our daily routine is free from booze, we move into the more difficult items, deaths and funerals, marriage and weddings, loss of jobs, health issues...we see other members trudge through great difficulty and we are given hope, slowly the things we though we could never stay sober through slip away and we drop the reservations.
Now, as mentioned at the top of this post there is one reservation that is a go, no go in alcoholics anonymous. If one is unwilling or unable to be honest with themselves and to maintain that honesty throughout their sober life, then one cannot achieve permanent sobriety. Staying away from a drink a day at a time requires that we be honest with ourselves and thus the statement, "If I am not honest with myself I will drink", is paradoxical because it is both a reservation and an absolute.
Close the doors...and the windows.
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